highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
We have started to decorate penises.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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