uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
