To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
