Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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