She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
