Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
