how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
