get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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