my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
