She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
