it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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