i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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