He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Randomize
