Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
