Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
