i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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