That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
he thought i was a dude.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
