I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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