Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
