At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
