I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
