my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize