Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
