Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
