aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
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I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
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My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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