quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
