i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Randomize