i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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