i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
