I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
pray to the hookup gods
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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