There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Randomize
