I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Randomize
