its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize