there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
