I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
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