he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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