Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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