It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize