hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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