last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
