You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
