That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Randomize
