No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
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Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
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I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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