I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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