let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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