is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
