I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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