We won't sleep together?
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
