Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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