whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
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