Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
love makes seman taste better
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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