As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
So much Jack, so little girl.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
